Tag Archives: Dreams

Loved in the Light: Meditations on Retreat, Building & the Importance of Sisterhood

Hey Speakerz! THIS WEEK! This week has been incredible, with the highlights of  an even more wonderful weekend and retreat. When I was a little girl, I recall that my mother would go on retreats with her best friends, her sisters. What they would do on this retreat, I have no idea, but they would always come back with shining souls and tired bodies and I couldn’t wait to be old enough to go on my own retreat weekend. This weekend, I returned to a place of home, New England, specifically Rhode Island with my friends and sisters and together we explored retreat, soulwork, racism, solidarity, ancestral remembrance, self and sisterhood.

I’ve been on a self-love adventure for a while now, and with each year that passes, I find myself more and more in tune with the world and all it’s never-ending levels. I’ve always known that my ancestors walk with me. My whole life I’ve felt them talk with me, walk with me, love me, hold me up and sometimes hold me back. One of the reasons why I love art so much is because I feel that I can use it to express those feelings in safety and adventurous exploration.

With the world that we human beings live in, there are so many stressors. The stress that capitalism and greed bring to the world. The hidden truths of the past in the metropolis’ that sprang from the great hurt of oppression and continued active genocide. The stress of growing up and old, etc. However, with all these stressors, it is truly possible to simply tune out of the stress frequency and in to the soul’s truth. Mayhap that’s the reason for the origins of long-standing practices of hermitage, medicine people, active sports, etc. Caring for the body, brain and soul is a mission in this world. I’ve always been interested in the nature, the land, the growth, the act of tuning in and getting the healing. This week, I found myself deep in preparation and solitude. Deep introspection ruled my days and I didn’t know why but I knew that it was so very necessary. This is where my sisters come in.

I have some amazing sisters. No, they’re not biological and yet that makes them no less of my family. Our souls have lived, searched and flown together for millenia and as we continue in this life, it is as though we fall into a routine all our own. All queer women with passion for education and work in the arts, they constantly challenge me to be better and to truly embrace all of myself. How often in the world is there such a strong connection between multiple individuals? We are a force. A sisterhood that endures despite space and time. Spending 2 whole days together meant strength in elevation. We actively challenge each other to love more openly, to speak strongly, to move with more intention and to trust the process. It is so incredibly important to have a team to build with and to establish balance. Just how do we push ourselves to be our best selves?

Healing comes in so many ways. For me, heading back to a place that I experienced profound hurt and joy in, helped me to realize that returning somewhere doesn’t make me any less of the person that I am today. Healing is immeasurable. I can’t really measure how much I’ve healed in a year, but I do know that I’m different and that I know much more of myself today than ever before, except maybe in my childhood. I know that I mentioned it on this blog a while ago, but I did a performance piece last year around 3 enslaved African women. Phyllis, Rose and Fanny. They’re buried in Providence, Rhode Island and going back gave me a chance to visit them once more. I felt so incredibly connected to their spirits, despite the fact that they died 200 years before I was even born.  I laid on their grave in the greenest of grass and as I did, the sun shone on me brighter than ever and I felt warmed with love. They led me to find my own people. My own origins. They held my back as I cried and experienced such pain for the land stolen and the pain that is still palpable today. Ancestors have a hold on us. They guide us and teach us. I truly believe that there is no such thing as coincidence.

I’ve always felt as a sexual violence survivor, that I wasn’t the first in my family. There had to be a narrative of sexual violence, just as there is a narrative of patriarchy and male violence throughout history, thereby giving us the name “his story”. I was right. The strongest of themes from this weekend was love. I have been told repeatedly that I need to be “Loved in the Light”. Myself, along with the women in my family and ancestral bloodlines have been so accepting of being loved in the dark. We take love in the various forms but how often to we demand the level of love that we give, back? We deserve to be loved in the light. We deserve no excuses and action with truth and acceptance. I don’t know that I’m so comfortable talking about all I experienced this weekend with my sisters. Maybe it’s just supposed to stay between us. What I can say is that I’m calling for an Elder to help me discover and understand more of my Native American Ancestry. I’m excited to delve into documentation and artwork that calls upon all the energy I possess and to step into my light as a healer descended from power-filled healers. For the first time in a long time, I am excited for my life. I let the tears fall as they may and the love wrap around me as a warming blanket of comfort and I move on.

 

Love Always,

 

Damali Speaks Xx

No Room for Error (Revolutionary Love) – Poetry by Damali Rose Zion

I demand

Everything

In a world of differing values and ethics

To remain in my space is to thrive

To exist in the radiance that is my

Love

Is to acknowledge that

YES

We are different

and yet we coexist.

Too many of the world’s children embrace mediocrity.

Love

Friendship

should not exist within those boundaries

Love is revolutionary.

My love has embraced imperfection and shattered your previous notions

I possess the capacity for

life changing love

But only for those willing to let vulnerability rain in waves of

sharing

hunting

exposing

the innermost being.

Those brave enough to dive deep.

Can you swim?

Let Us Not Forget: Meditations on How and When to Slow Down and Live in Truth

Hay Blogosphere! The last time we spoke in this fashion, I was just about to venture to New York City. Well, here I am in NYC, setting up my apartment, working all the time on myself, my elevation, and my art. It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything in a political vein. I think I let that part of myself disappear a little bit because frankly, I’d much rather live with all of my energy intact and too much of my energy was sacrificed in moments of speaking politically and critically. I do realize that being an activist is a deep part of myself and in the wake of the Womens’ March on Washington and other cities and talks of intentional spaces devoted to all women, I found myself sliding back into the thoughts that I once loved so very much. Talking about injustice and working toward the collective human experience go hand in hand in my spirit. So what is the topic today, you ask? The topic of today is about not forgetting the truth, the importance of knowing  your spirit and listening when the universe says to slow down.

In this particular world that we live in, we all hold different identities. While some of us hold fast to these labels, others of us don’t. But society likes to define us human beings in gender, sex, “race”, socioeconomic stature and more. The further breakdown encompasses “what we do”, our hobbies, our bread and butter, our talents, what makes us money. Somewhere thousands of years ago, somehow those designated sexually as male, decided to oppress those sexually designated as female. Through centuries of perfection of the system, we have patriarchy as it exists today. Separated into categories mentioned previously, there developed the hierarchy according to “race” and sex, etc. This applies to the Womens Marches because every time women as an oppressed group gather to voice, somehow, white women are always the loudest voice. Until this changes, where can a movement of womens’ concerns go? Until all women are truly listened to and accepted for the magnificent Goddess deity’s that we are, how can we instill change? The short answer being that we can’t, and that is why very little progress for all women’s rights has truly taken flight across the globe, not just in the United States but elsewhere as well.

Since exploring the self love journey and truly seeing where the rabbit hole goes, I’m learning how to listen when the universe says to slow down. Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of work, and very little slow down, with vampire hours of operation. Although this feels good because I love working for myself, this can sometimes facilitate a work into a whole. There are lots of ways in which the universe facilitates a slow down. It always takes me a huge whammy because as my mother says, “A hard head makes a soft behind.” So today while making a smoothie, I cut my finger. I mean, cut into, lots of blood, hand taped up cut. Did I really need any other message for slowing all the way down? Nope! I could say,  woe is me, I can’t draw or write for at least a week, but that’s boring. I can still type, drive and truly exercise my ambidextrous nature!

When the Universe forcefully places things in our path, how well do we adapt? Human beings are natural adaptors. We either adapt or die. We see it all the time in survival films and tv shows. We go back to our natural state of being and adapt, move forward. Meanwhile, as we survive, we forget about how important it is to thrive. On this incredible journey of life, let nothing stop you from your dreams and needs. Constantly challenge yourself to adapt, breathe and move at a pace that you set for yourself.

 

Love always,

Damali Speaks Xx